rusticpans I decided to take the boardwalk to the Cabaret Fiesta stage, which turned out to be a bit of a mistake. The Narasirato Pan Pipers were about to start, and they must have picked up some fans with their Thursday night set at the Red Marquee, because the path was gridlocked. At times like these, I’d usually take it as a sign from the God of music festivals and stay to watch the act I’m gridlocked in front of, but the schedule said I had to watch Rustic Pans, so I pressed on, and I made the right choice.
The Rustic Pans are a six-piece that claim to play Cuban music, but that’s clearly only because they’ve been put at the tent sorta sponsored by Havana Club and subtitled “Havana Nights”. Clearly this is Trinidadian. Sorta. The Rustics play the steel drums with a broader range than you’ll probably hear in the Caribbean. There’s only so much range you can get from a 6-piece where 5 of you play steel drums, but they get right to the edges of that range.
But enough of the music. One of the guys looks like Ozzy Osbourne on lots of uppers. He’s got the same face (Ozzy from the ‘70s) but he grins broader than I’ve ever seen a grin. By his side is a guy who is probably about 4’ 5”, and looks like the baddie in a Scarface knockoff. I’m pretty sure all these guys would get no women if they weren’t in a band. I’m not so sure they get any women even being in a band.
They’re all wearing matching Hawaiian shirts, which won’t help their women situation either.
Every so often, Osbourne pulls out a toy cap gun and fires it in time with the music. Sometimes it jams, but he just grins and fixes it and fires again. The band like to do a crescendo thing where they start with their faces beneath the pans and rise up with the music. When Ozzie’s face appears, he’s grinning the biggest grin.
A Japanese guy next to me turns round and says “I think THIS is Fuji Rock.” I think so too. Best band so far, and they’re not playing again. You had your chance.

Groove ★ ★ ★ ★ ★
Cuban ★
Seatability